"Hello and Namaste"

I might not have stars and planets here, but this is still my universe!

Thursday, December 24, 2015

The goddess in blue jacket.

I have never seen a goddess as they picture in photographs
I have never seen a goddess looking exactly the same as the statues in temples
I have never seen a goddess that way.
And that doesn't mean i don't believe in Goddesses
I do,
Its just that the goddess i believe in looks entirely different
than the one the world worships.
Its just that the goddess i believe in stands above heaven, hell and the earth too.
Its just that the goddess i believe in is mightier than the religion itself.
Its just that the goddess i believe in is someone only i can see as a goddess.
To others she might appear as any normal girl
To others her powers might seem invisible
To others her religion might be unknown
And they're all blind
They don't see what i see
They don't feel what i feel
Their senses are limited to five
whereas i got the sixth one that senses the power of this goddess
that sees her
that feels her
that believes in her
and that worships her.
No, goddesses don't always look slim as if they were on a diet the whole life
(well that's what we've seen in photographs right?)
No, goddesses don't always have four hands and pose scary in photos
No, goddesses don't always have weird weapons in their hands
No, goddesses don't always wear a skirt made out of severed hands of demons.
And most of all looking at a picture of a goddess doesn't always frighten people.
Sometimes goddesses look simple,
we just need the right pair of eyes.
Sometimes goddesses have only two hands.
Sometimes goddesses don't wield weapons in their hands.
Sometimes goddesses look chubby like a baby panda
sometimes goddeses wear a trouser that looks like made up from a blanket.
And they surely dont wear weird scary skirts made of hands,
Sometimes they just show up in a light blue jacket.

Saturday, December 19, 2015

Phone Call.....


Tring Tring!!!
Tring Tring!!!
The phone in my pocket rings
the vibration sends a wave throughout my body
and then when i take the phone out
see your name on the screen
with your pretty face looking back at my not so pretty one
the vibration then
runs through all my veins 
travel through my bloodstream
and then reaches to my heart.
And the vibration beats the heart even more
the heart beats as if it's playing a beat of a love song
the heart does so 'cause it knows that its owner is fucking happy
'cause he will be talking to the goddess that he worships.

And when i say hello
and you reply  me back
with that voice which feels as if it is echoing straight down from heaven
which feels as if it's been sent down straight from the Goddess' throat
which feels more melodious than music itself.
a flame of happiness ignites inside me
a flame that can never be contained
a flame that burns real bright but yet doesn't burn me
but enough to keep me warm
a flame that makes me happy
a flame that makes me go through the day 
not worrying about a single thing.
'cause that's what i need to go through my day.
just to hear your voice once
and it will be enough.
I love you.


Tuesday, December 1, 2015

Zzzz... Zzz...


भुकम्पको डरमा 
एउटा चिसो सुकुलको भरमा
अध्यारो रात मा कठ्याङ्ग्रिदै
टाँगेको पालमा पनि निदायो मेरो देश|
नेता हरुले पुर्याएको
बेवारिसे तालमा पनि निदायो मेरो देश |
बाढी पहिरो
केहि ले रोक्न सकेन
हावा हुरी कसैले टोक्न सकेन
पछारियो आफै जब आफ्नो भार
आफै ले बोक्न सकेन
तर पनि बढी रह्यो
संयौ चोटी लडीरह्यो
भोक प्यास गुमाए पनि
निन्द्रा भने  चै त्याग्न सकेनछ यो देश ले
तेसैले त सधै निदईराख्छ
शत्रु ले आखा गाढ्दा पनि निदाउछ
आफ्नै ले भाग लगाई बाढ्दा पनि निदाउछ
डर लाग्छ
कुनै दिन कैले नउठ्ने गरि निदाउने पो हो कि ?

DECEMBER....

It doesn't snow here,
but what does it cost to imagine?.

I sit down on my chair
with a novel in  front of me
a cup of hot black coffee
and my eyes staring out the window
to the white wonderland.
Yes, i do wanna complete the novel
but at the same time i don't wanna finish it.
I do wanna drink that cup of coffee
but it won't keep me warm for much long
and I'm too lazy to get up and make myself another cup.
December got me on my power saving mode.

I think i shall read this novel some other day.
The outside world seems more amazing
more beautiful
more wonderful than the world, these pages hold.
I'm gonna go take a walk,
into the world of fantasy.
Its too cold outside
I'm gonna need a warm jacket
a pair of gloves
a hat
and a pair of socks.
Aah, now it feels warm and cozy.
Oh! i almost forgot about that coffee i had
A quick sip from the cup and I'm good to go.

As i step out from the door
the first thing i see is snow
and as far as my eyes can gaze into the thick foggy mist
all i see is heaps of whites getting blur as the distance increases.
There's snow everywhere.
The snow doesn't feel cold though,
well it does freeze my fingers the moment i touch it
it does make me shiver
but deep inside
there is a warmth
i feel as if i have the sun right inside my heart
radiating the heat
keeping me warm
and making me able to withstand the cold.
I always thought that way,
i have a sun in my heart.
A sun hot enough to keep me warm,
but yet not too hot to burn me.

Embraced by the warmth of this sun
i walk ahead
into the world of snow.
With every steps i take
i smile a little more.
With every distance i cover
the snow feels a less colder.
I feel as if i was moving towards the warmth that a certain someone radiated.
I keep walking
and walking
and walking until i reach this sun.
And when my feet stop
and i lift my head up too look
I see the sun right in front of my eyes,
this sun is bright enough to amaze me
brighter than that big ball of fire floating in the sky
yet gentle enough not to blind me.
This sun isn't a big ball of fire
but something that lived, existed and was a living being .
And as i slowly turn my eyes to get a look of this sun,
I see you.
This sun wouldn't burn me even if i hugged her.
And i do so.
And then I'm walking again
but this time, not alone.
but with you.
And you tell me, "the snow looks beautiful, doesn't it ? "
I have no answer 'cause i was looking at something a billion times more beautiful.
i was just looking at you.
i don't know what i was supposed to answer.
All i say is "i love you" and kiss you in the forehead
and continue walking with you
on the streets of Baneshwor,
and yes "Everest hotel ko bato".

It doesn't snow here, right?
but what does it cost to imagine? :)

Sunday, November 29, 2015

I came first.

There is a gap of five years between us
and yes, i am taking the lead.
I came first.
But just because i came first
doesn't mean that i am more amazing
doesn't mean that i am more perfect
doesn't mean that i am more wonderful.
I might have won against you on the race to come to this earth
but i lost in all the remaining ones.
Coz you are more amazing than i can ever imagine
you are more perfect than even perfection has ever been
you are more wonderful
more magical
you are the best.
And though i lost
i am not sad coz its you who've won
and that makes me the ultimate winner
coz in your smile is where i find my happiness.
I know we grew up
with families of our own,
Still i must remind you
that i came first
and you came after 5 years crying and screaming
with a little body
tiny feet
and tiny hands.
A sister was born then, for me, though that time i had no idea
but now i completely understand.
i love you.

White earphones.

Talking about me,
I'd be the one probably busy in my own world
not giving a shit about what others think.
You can see me crying
and then you can see me smiling in a blink.
I'm probably the one not giving a shit about how life goes on.
Want to find me in a crowd?
I'm probably the guy with the white earphones on.
I'm a freak, one of a kind.
Someone like me?
I bet even Adele won't find.
I'm the guy whose greatest weakness is chocolate,
if I was made of it then I'd probably eat myself.
I'm the one so much obsessed with Taylor swift songs.
Want to find me in a crowd?
I'm probably the guy with the white earphones on.
I'm the kinda guy
who drinks his own tears and stands out strong.
I'm the one faking a huge smile
even though I know it's not for long.
I'm the one who can memorize lyrics in a minute.
I've been reading my text book for hours,
still have no idea what's in it.
I'm the guy who'll make his own words burn.
Want to find me in a crowd?
I'm probably the guy with the white earphones on......

Friday, November 27, 2015

THAT SATURDAY NIGHT...

Like any other Saturday night,
she knew that her husband would come back home drunk
she knew that her husband would forget bringing her the medicines she needed.
she knew after hours of fight
he would convince her somehow
then fuck her 
till he could fuck no more.
His mouth would be stinking like a devil's trashcan
but yet she would have no other choice than to kiss him and pretend that she felt good,
even though she didn't.
Like any other Saturday night,
he did come home late.
like any other Saturday night
he was drunk as hell. 
She heard him saying shit and other stuffs about her.
she ran to get the door
because she knew he would beat the shit out of her
if he had to knock and keep waiting outside for the door to open.
When she opened the door,
there he was
the man claimed to be her husband
shaking like the Eiffel tower from an earthquake
She knew he'd been with another woman
she could smell the scent of perfume that wasn't his.
And yet,
she smiled.
her husband went straight to the bedroom
she followed him quietly.
she knew her husband was hungry and thirsty too
but his hunger wasn't gonna disappear from the dinner she'd served downstairs
his thirst wasn't gonna disappear from the bottle of water she'd kept beside the bed.
He wanted her
though she'd been ill for quite some days now.
he wanted her 
even though she couldn't sustain the pain of his so called manhood piercing her.
She let him have her.
She stayed motionless,
tears rolling down from her eyes 
her heart bleeding
she didn't say a word
she cried silent tears.
All she thought about was her three years old daughter sleeping peacefully
all she thought about was taking the medicines she was supposed to 
all she thought about was its been three days since the last dose of her medicine was finished
all she thought about was how her husband never really thought about it.
she kept thinking 
he kept piercing her.
She let a huge scream out her mouth
and then there was complete silent again
her husband fell asleep right beside her.
her scream woke her daughter up
her daughter kept crying 
she was just 3
She woke up and she was hungry
She kept crying 
her mother didn't hear
she finally managed to crawl to her mother
she sucked the nipple of her mother that her father left exposed
it was cold
she sucked the nipple maybe for a minute or two
but yet it felt to her like eternity
she kept sucking the nipple of her dead mother
but nothing happened
her mother was already as far as she could ever be
her mother was dead and in an hour so was she.

A Legal Rape

She never wanted to marry that guy
She never wanted to spend the rest of her life with that devil
She never wanted to...
But she had to.
He'd been following her since the very first day he saw her
In every streets
Every bus stops
She had to hide from him but he always managed somehow to find her in the crowd
He didn't love her
He just wanted her
He promised her father to pay all his debts and he sold her to him.
She had to marry him
She was hugged
She was kissed
She was fucked
But she was never loved
She had two kids but the kids never got the love of a father
He wasn't a father to them
Just a man who's been fucking their mother everynight.
Nobody knew what happened inside that house
Everybody thought a couple lived there happily with two beautiful kids.
Nobody saw the pain in her eyes.
Nobody knew that the kids never got the love of a father
They just thought he married that girl because he loved him
But nobody knew the truth
The truth was out of their sight
Nobody was there to wipe those tears off her face
when she was raped, legally, every night.

Thursday, November 26, 2015

The Purple Rose.

The Purple Rose


 Red has always been the color of love.
the color that symbolizes warmth
the color that symbolizes passion
the color of heat
the color of affection.
Red.
The color of the blood that runs through the heart,
red.
Red is not the only color that defines love.
Love is more colorful than the rainbow
A single color cant define love.
Love is red for the warmth
love is blue for the skies that feel smaller when it comes to love
love is black for the times we choose to close our eyes 
love is grey when we feel sad sometimes
love is colorless sometimes too
love doesn't need to be defined by a color
you wont succeed even if you try 
for love is deeper than the colors that you can ever imagine
Love has colors more than the world has ever seen
love is magical
love is wonderful
love is just love
and love is everything when its me, loving you
If i really had to define love with a color
I'd go with purple
the color of the queens
and yes love is purple too
compared to other colors, more beautiful and distinct
and that is why the purple rose blooms when i kiss you on the lips
despite the color of your lipstick.